Tension and blood shed...I know, it sounds very violent...but I lead a generally peaceful life...so it's not as bad as all of that. :)

For starters, I have been told for years that I cannot give blood due to my travels in Africa, which made me sad because prior to those travels, I gave blood regularly (something about giving life to someone else makes me enjoy this). Yesterday, Red Cross was on campus doing a blood drive and out of pure curiosity, I asked them, "Can I give blood? I lived in Africa for the last two years." I was shocked when they said "Which country?" And still even more shocked when, after telling them, they said "Sure, it shouldn't be a problem at all." So...I gave blood yesterday for the first time in years. And suffered the consequences...I realized that regardless of our minds, our bodies do get older...and granted, I'm not old...but I didn't bounce back the way I used to...no worries, nothing major.

Now for the tension. There is an issue that I have been struggling with for many, many months...simply this: Where missions is concerned, should I go where it is most strategic (i.e. unreached/Muslims) or should I go to where my gifting and heart lines up more (i.e. relief type ministries)? I have attempted to ask several people about this question (I still can't phrase it quite right) and no one has really understood what I am asking...until yesterday in a class group that I was in. And this guy in my group said EXACTLY what I have been hoping someone who understood my heart question would say....he said, "You need to stop worrying about the emphasis of the hour (Muslims) and go where you are called."

"It seems so obvious," you say. "YES!" I heartily agree. But people don't say that. The emphasis at CIU and in churches is the Muslim world...and I see that as most strategic because of what God is doing in the Muslim world right now...however, God has given me a passion for children, particularly children who don't have a chance in life...and the thing about kids is, they are the leaders of tomorrow...if we catch them early with the love of Christ...there is so much hope for tomorrow. Meeting felt needs, as my prof said, shows how God enters their world.

Ok, so its obvious and I'm stubborn and not the brightest lightbulb at times...but sometimes you just need someone to say, "It's ok...you don't have to do what people see as the most strategic ministry. Go where God is calling you." So whereas I'm not sure yet of the impact (as I said yesterday in my moment of clarity--see below), it just felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders...again, the clouds parted, the sun was shining down, all the angelic voices were singing in harmony...and it just made sense. We'll see where God goes with it. :)