I was planning a trip for spring break to go to Abidjan to see Joel. My mission told me that I was not allowed to go for security reasons. I can respect that, but it doesn't detract from the sting of disappointment I feel. I have 2.5 weeks of time that I was going to go and meet his world and spend time with him. I know that God is probably working something out in His own way, but I can't help but feel that I have been knocked down yet again. This is a time when I have to rely on the head knowledge I have that God is good and that I am His daughter and pray that somehow it will take over the disappointment in my heart. I know it will eventually. It always does. I feel like I have experienced many disappointments in this year...but it has forced me to keep pushing and believing and looking for the good in life. I confess to many failures to do that. I'm not superwoman, I'm just a girl. But a girl with a great Father God who loves with a furious love. Yet the sting of disappointment doesn't just dissipate, it leaves me something else to surrender and to trust God with. I should be thankful, and in time I will be. The wound is still fresh...but as a friend of mine used to always say, "It's all good."